Before Me

I have set the LORD continually before me; Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.

I have this nongift of forgetting too easily. Unless it is right under my nose, or in neon lights, or in big bold letters, somehow it gets left in the dust. It's a tragedy, most of my life I try spending moving on. I just spent a couple weeks away from home, so as I crawl back into my familiar blankets tonight, I spot a couple items that I had intentionally put beside my bed: two hefty checks (already deposited, don't you be worryin' bout that). And I was overwhelmed again, the way I was a month ago. The way God shows up. His constant provision, that I work so hard to make ends meet for, He keeps saying He's got. I stood those checks up there to be seen as plain as day, so that I might see them when I rise or when I turn the light off. So I could say my praise once again, so that I could dismiss all doubt that maybe this won't work out. 

These words are more than my need for money, these words are my need for my God. If I don't place my Jesus before me, I'll forget. I'll forget the depths of the love that I'm caught up in. I'll forget that He holds the whole world in His hand. I'll forget that when things swirl out of my control and I try to hide from the pain, the unknowns, the sadness, it was never out of His sight. He didn't just choose to not see this. And I need to choose to see Him before me, beside me, to my right, or to the right of my bedside. I need to rise and like Moses say, "If Your presence does not go with us, do not lead us up from here." I will set and keep setting, and not be shaken when the earth crumbles beneath me because the Holy One is walking this out. 

He's already taking my fiery darts, defending my fight, cheering on my dreams, giving me rest, while I walk behind; if He's before me there's nowhere else to be but wrapped up in His presence. Nowhere else but caught up in worship when I see reminders of His grace. Nowhere else to go when I want to just stay here. 

Beside 

Before 

Won't You say 

You want more

To be caught up 

In this presence 

I'll ride it ashore 

As You hold 

The seas in place 

World in hand 

Do I believe 

What I believe 

Sing childhood anthems 

With just as much peace

Just as belief 

Remind me 

This is sacred space 

I cultivate 

Oh I create that 

Which signifies 

My impulsivity to run 

Or my heart to hold fast 

Your promises 

Truer than true 

My life will nothing lack

You are so much better 

Than what I thought I could have